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when will me and my friend get to have things how they used to be.. Free question

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Anonymous
# Posted: 9 Aug 2008 12:49
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Me and my friend are banned from seeing each other right now. Her dad wont let me come over, and my dad won't even let me anywhere that she is. She is my best friend and one of my only friends. When will things just get to be how they used to?

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TomAdmin
Admin
# Posted: 10 Aug 2008 20:25
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my best tip for this one, although very simple is to not bug your either of your Dad's about this issue for at least a week or two..

there is a simple magical process that takes place over time and it is called 'memory loss'...

as the two week period passes by his anger feelings or hostility about you two may be at least half as much as it was before. So then on a friday evening (fridays most people are in better spirits) you could try to see if either of them would change their minds... you would have the odds on your side that way...

Remember, the more anger or dissapointment you show to either of your Dads about his decision, the more power you are giving him towards this issue, the more likely things will NOT change...

Therefore you need to plant in your minds whether you believe it or not that things are fine and pleasant and almost as if a problem never even existed before. Believe and act that as much as you can... and it will help the cause of his change of mind when all of you are ready...

anyone else have some insight on this ??

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Anonymous
# Posted: 8 Oct 2008 00:08
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well, that could work and it could also have disasterous results. By this girl pretending that everything is ok and happy right after the big argument, could make her father suspicious that his daughter is seeing the banned friend behind his back, or that his disappointment isn't affecting her feelings and his punishment isnt doing its job, and may punish her even more. Its like saying to her father, na na na na na, you didn't hurt me, so Im going to rub it in your face by faking my happiness. That might upset him even more, and he might think of an even more punishment, to "get through to her feelings"
I think that her simply talking to her father on his level and letting him know that she and her friend are responsible people and wont do things that upset their parents. Im sure they did something before that caused her father to ban them. She should tell her father that his punishment did hurt her badly and if he let her see her friend that they would both talk to her father about being more responsible friends and that they would try to keep each other out of trouble.

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